Combining Passions and Kissing Self-Censorship Goodbye

In two weeks I will be celebrating Meals with Morri’s 3rd Anniversary. Three years of recipes, change, and growth under the “delicious, nutritious, and gluten free” banner.

But that’s the thing: it isn’t simply about being a gluten free blogger anymore.

With the start of grad school and deciding to live in Malta to gain experience in the sustainable development field, I’ve noticed, with disdain I might add, how little blogging I’ve actually been doing since, well, life happened. And it’s not that I don’t cook. I do. And it’s not that I don’t have anything to say. I do, and do so quite loudly. But so much change as left me overwhelmed and depressed at times, and the last thing I want to do is resent my passions by feeling obligated.

As the three-year mark looms closer, I realized I’d been censoring myself on this site. Why? Because gods forbid I make someone uncomfortable with what I write. Gods forbid someone among the thousands of readers who read and test my recipes get so upset that they stop reading Meals with Morri forever. All my life, everyone’s opinions of me mattered and I would harshly internalize when I did or said something ‘wrong’.

I promise you, this rant has a point.

I’ve kept my activism and Meals with Morri aspect separate, when in reality it was through blogging during my studies in conflict resolution that kick-started my passions and what I wanted to do with my career. Through blogging, I learned about sustainable development, climate change, responsible agricultural practices, holistic health, public policy, food politics, yoga, rock climbing, positive body image, and more. Suddenly, the idea of bringing food into my conflict resolution practice didn’t seem so ridiculous.

Which brings me back to my self-censorship. At one point early on in my blogging career, I actually went back and softened up certain words or phrases that seemed ‘critical’ (I stopped using the word ‘hate’ at some point). I wasn’t spouting hatred and “I’m right, you’re wrong” nonsense; I was simply offering my critical opinion of where I stood.

So with the three-year mark coming up, I began to ask what I had to show for it. I have almost reached 100,000 pageviews and seen all over the world with 231 blog posts, and am planning new pages that emphasize my passions. I have a series of ideas in how to broaden my horizons (within and outside the MWM boundaries), which includes: foodie videos, getting published on other sites, reflections on activism, and interviews with compassionate individuals in various fields.

Qarabaghli mimli fil-forn (Maltese translation: Stuffed Courgettes; inspired recipe here) 

4 Large marrows (roughly 1 Kg or 2 lbs.)
1 Large red onion
1 Garlic clove
2 Dried Bay leaves
2 Large tomatoes
2 tbsp. Tomato paste
300 g Ricotta*
2 Large eggs**
4 tbsp. Grated Parmesan cheese or Kefalotyri***
Olive oil
Fine grain white corn polenta
Sea salt
Cracked pepper

Preheat the oven to 180°C/350°F, and lightly coat the baking dish with olive oil.
Cut the marrows lengthwise in half and scoop out the insides with a teaspoon.****
On either side of the marrow, coat with the olive oil that was used in lining the dish pan.
Fry the onion, garlic, bay leaves, and tomatoes in some olive oil until soft, followed by the tomato paste to cook for a further few minutes. (Be sure to remove the bay leaves!)
Add in the ricotta and mix thoroughly, allowing it to cool slightly before adding the eggs.
Season to taste preference (although the cheese was salty enough for me).
Fill the marrow halves with the cheese-veggie mixture and then lightly sprinkle with the polenta (roughly 1/4 tsp. per marrow) followed by the grated cheese.
Bake for about 45 minutes until the marrows have softened and the mixture has firmed and slightly browned on top.
Serve hot (although delicious cold) on top of potatoes, rice, beans, or whatever you’re craving.

Makes 8 stuffed marrows. Servings vary depend on meal type.

Vegan Options include: *300 g drained and mashed (although not smooth) cooked black beans; ** 2 Flax eggs; *** 4 tbsp. Nutritional yeast

**** The recipe called for using the pulp, but I found that I really didn’t have the space for it in the recipe. Since this recipe is apparently great with baked MDP’s, I suggest finely chopping the pulp and sauteing it with potatoes along with onion and garlic. Also, to keep the halves upright, I sliced a small sliver from the outside.

Sweet Potato and Zucchini Frittata

I’m counting down the days until I leave for Malta. It’s strange, almost like a dream, to be planning for a year abroad. The semester is half over, and there is so much to consider: medication, budgeting, schoolwork along with a 40-hour workweek. It’s all so surreal, but it’s typical of me. I never do things at half-mast. If I’m going to experience change, it’s going to be a ton of changes all at once, like a Band-Aid being pulled off quickly to avoid the prolonged suffering.

Thirty-eight days. I have just over a month and a week until I fly to Europe. Thirty-eight days to see as many people as I can, to make as many memories as I can, and to get as much schoolwork and paperwork done as possible before I board that plane. What books do I bring? What clothes do I pack? Would I be able to pack the large teddy bear that CK (the boyfriend, that is) gave me for Christmas last year? Could I pack my hobbies and paint, sew, rock climb, and photograph while I was away? What about the Insanity workout and yoga? What about gardening?

Volunteering as a Photographer for MD's Halloween Bloc Party

It’s all so daunting in an exciting, holy crap sort of way. I’ve never been to a place that didn’t have leaves change or snow fall during months that usually do in my neck of the woods before. Actually, I’ve never been to the Mediterranean before either, but I’ve heard wonderful things from CK (you can get to know him here). For one thing, the cheese and the wine are famous for reasons taste buds can accredit; for another, local food sources year-round would be in abundance. These things excite me almost as much as the internship and being in the same time zone as CK do. There’s an entire culture I get to be part of, with recipes to make to further understand the country I’ll be living in.

But what about the autumn weather I so enjoy here on the east coast? What about the fall flavors of root vegetables and warm spices to fill you up and ground you: will it be the same over in Malta? Will baked apples, squash, and other slow-cooked foods provide the same satisfaction in Mediterranean weather as it does around this time of year back home?

I have no idea, but I’m excited to find out. Until then, I have a series of recipes that are perfect for the autumn season: warm, filling, nutritious, and (as always) gluten-free.

Sweet Potato and Zucchini Frittata

1 tbsp. Ghee*
1 tbsp. Olive oil
600 g / 3 small Sweet potatoes, shredded
1 Green zucchini, shredded
1 Yellow onion, halved and sliced into thin crescents
4 Garlic cloves
100 g Fresh kale, coarsely chopped
9 Large eggs, blended
Sea Salt, to taste
Herbs, to taste**
3 Small tomatoes, sliced thinly

Preheat the oven to 350°F.
In a large, deep skillet (or stainless steel wok) on medium heat, pour the oils and spread along the bottom of the pan.
At smoking point, add the onions and sauté for a minute or so, and then the sweet potato, zucchini, and garlic.
Cover and let soften for five to ten minutes, stirring periodically to make sure it cooks thoroughly but doesn’t burn.
Once softened, turn off the heat and toss in the salt and herbs, followed by the eggs (you may need to turn the mixture in the pan to ensure even coating).
Place the tomatoes on top in a design of your choosing.
Cover the pan with foil and baked in the oven for 30 minutes.
Take the foil of the top and allow the frittata to bake for another 20 - 30 minutes or until done.
Remove from the oven and let it sit for a couple minutes.
Slice into wedges and serve hot.

Makes 4 Servings.

*If you don't have ghee, you can substitute with regular butter. If you want this to be completely dairy free, you can just use 2 tbsp. olive oil instead.

**You could do just about anything with this dish regarding herbs. I mean, I considered allspice and cinnamon. But I ended up with a couple dashes each of tarragon, basil, and Parisian Bonnes Herbes.

All Work and No Play

The Burt-man recently asked me if I have enough fun. It’s the sort of question that hits you in the face like cold water in the mornings. It wakes you up. It makes you think.

I go to school full time. In grad school terms, that’s nine credits or higher. That’s nine hours in the classroom, six of them being in the late evening. I then devote three days to studying, one for each class, and studying (as well as paper writing and presentation making) can take up to fifteen hours in total. I also work part-time; nothing fancy, just twelve hours three days a week. It takes my mind off school and it’s one of the best jobs I’ve ever had, but it’s still a job. It still takes a lot of energy to be present for the kids as well as my co-workers.

If we add it all together, plus the time it takes to commute, school and work equal to a full-time job. (Mad respect for grad school students who are parents and/or with full-time careers. You guys are the kings and queens of time management.)

Due to the change in my schedule this semester, this meant I had to stop rock climbing for a while. (I just about cried when I told SportRock I needed to freeze my account.) I couldn’t make the time to go in the evenings, because by that point I was exhausted and all I wanted to do was read another novel from Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series. My mornings have been devoted to sleeping eight hours, and simply just chilling out or working on projects. I barely had the energy to do Insanity, let alone to go out and see people and go on adventures. I’ve never been so appreciative of my bed before this semester, or sleeping in general.

I'm so jealous that my cats can literally sleep whenever they want.

It’s the final stretch towards obtaining my Masters Degree, and it has me hyperfocusing so narrowly that I literally have to schedule fun and force myself out the door to have it. Don’t get me wrong; I love my classes and my job. I enjoy the readings, the discussions, and being in the classroom. I cherish the time I have with the kids and my friends at work. But the Burt-man’s question irked me, because it’s true. I’ve forgotten how to have spontaneous fun without the fear of procrastination and motivation looming over my head.

Fun became an expense. I couldn't afford it anymore.

I also have been preparing for my internship in 2014. Yes, I got an internship. In Malta. For a year. I have never been so excited and so terrified for anything before. I will be leaving in early December to settle into this new chapter of my life. So along with the typical week I mentioned, I also have a year of being abroad to consider: what to pack, what paperwork is needed, where I’ll be living, how I will need to budget, etc. I considered doing distance-learning classes along with the internship and my school’s requirements for internship credit in the spring, but decided against it. Why? Because I’m going to be in Malta, that’s why! Because my internship is a forty-hour workweek, and because I want to do my best and still have fun while I’m there.

So with papers and projects coming up (or in one class’s case, a midterm due tomorrow), I am getting myself in the writing groove by writing this post and talking about emotional health.  Guys, everyone needs fun for themselves, even when your schoolwork and your job are things you look forward to every day. You need time (or a day) to yourself to do things for you. That’s why I’m getting myself out of this motivation rut and will set aside time to myself every day to make fun and be creative. If you focus on all the things that have to get done, nothing ever will. Recipes won't happen. Grades will start slipping. Depression and illness will settle in. Work will seem like a chore. 

So I'm having fun this fall. I'm making time and I'm making meals again.

Autumn is my favorite season. I love the crisp in the air, the color changing in the leaves, and the seasonal crops on the shelves and in the farmers markets. Virginia is bursting with apples, squash, and dark leafy greens, and I wanted to honor that with a dish. It’s a casserole that will keep you warm on those rainy days and chilly evenings. I call it the Three Sisters Casserole because it has corn, squash, and legumes in it, but you can most certainly taste the autumn in every bite.

Three Sisters Casserole

Pumpkin Cornbread batter*
227 g Cooked black beans
1 Medium Zucchini, thinly sliced
200 g Kale, coarsely chopped
3 (240 g) Chicken Thighs, cooked and coarsely chopped**
1 Yellow onion, halved and cut into thin crescents
3 Garlic cloves, coarsely chopped
1/2 tsp. Sea salt
Dash of Sage
50 g Parmesan cheese

Preheat the oven to 425°F.
In a medium sized bowl, combined the dry ingredients and then the wet ingredients of the pumpkin cornbread batter and set aside.
In a large pot (or stainless steel wok) on medium heat, pour a tablespoon of your cooking oil of choice.
Upon smoking temperature, sauté the onion, garlic, zucchini, and kale and cook until soft.
Add the beans and chicken and continue cooking on medium-low heat for five minutes and add the sea salt and the sage.
Turn off the heat and sprinkle the Parmesan cheese on top.
Pour the batter over top and bake for 25 – 30 minutes, or until the crust is golden brown and it is cooked all the way through.

Serves 4 – 6.

*Pumpkin Cornbread
90 g Sorghum flour
1 tsp. Baking soda
1 tsp. Unrefined Apple Cider Vinegar
21 g Honey
3/4 tsp. Sea salt
150 g Masa flour
2 Large eggs
15 g Ghee (or melted butter)
250 ml Whole Milk
250 ml Water
200 g Pumpkin puree

Prepare as you would your typical cornbread recipe, which can be found here.

**Vegetarian, you say? No problem! Simply replace the chicken with another 240 g of cooked beans. You can also substitute it with mushrooms, butternut squash, more cheese, or additional veggies.